As I sat on a high stool overlooking a busy street in Paris, I stared at all the people old and young, black and white and mixed going about their business....A pretty girl smiling into her phone and crossing the road, a tall blond haired guy in jeans and a blazer briskly crossing the road dragging his suitcase. An asian woman rushing as though her life depended on the speed with which she could go across the road.. A couple walking hand in hand and smiling into each other's eyes, a black blind woman using her stick to make her way.. As I watched them, I thought of Ayoola.... She didn't see what was coming, she was gonna go about her usual business when she got home. Looking into her fiance's eyes and telling him she loves him; rushing off in her car to sort out last minute matters; calling her parents to ask them not to invite half of lagos to her wedding in August and of course attending church gatherings to express her love for her God.
As I look at this people going past me as I peer through the glass in a boulangerie (breakfast diner) I wonder who'll drop next.. It could be me, but God forbid my life or that of anyone I know to go prematurely.. I don't know the people who go past me but someone else does and someday they'll feel the pain we all do now at this grave loss.. I've asked myself so many times since 3rd june why I checked her status on that fateful grey day... I hadn't chatted wit her since 8th may but in my mind I believed I had.. You see someone else on my phone had a similar name and had pinged me on Saturday so I was certain it was Ayoola.. She said she wanted to travel to paris too and I said she should make sure she does someday. Later, I realised I was chatting with Deola not Ayoola. I don't know why I mixed it up.. I told myself I would check up on Ayoola later. I eventually did, but when I did it was too late and I never got a response. Ayoola was gone..
We weren't the closest of friends.. But in the short time I knew her, I loved her like I would any other friend. Ayoola was thoughtful, kind, considerate and cheerful. What I remember most about her is her smile and her simplicity. We also shared an appreciation of growing natural hair and she inspired me to grow mine! She always cared that I got bored in Lagos and didn't have as many friends, which shows to me her value on relationships.. My last conversation with her, she thanked me for spamming a bb message that made her laugh. I apologized in advance for missing her wedding and she mentioned my sisters would be there so it was all cool. She made plans and she most likely lived everyday not thinking the inevitable unknown end would happen when she was still 30. But it did and those plans are up in smoke. C'est la vie, as they say in french.. I feel so sad and yet I'm not her family. How deep must their pain run through? How many tears will their eyes produce? Sleepless nights? I can only pray for them as not enough words can be said to heal their pain. God will turn their ashes to an oil of gladness and healing will be theirs eventually for he is the comforter of those who mourn. Let the inevitability and unknowing nature of death stir in us a desire to set our priorities straight and to make amends where necessary. Goodbye Ayoola. You were loved. ------------------
As I look at this people going past me as I peer through the glass in a boulangerie (breakfast diner) I wonder who'll drop next.. It could be me, but God forbid my life or that of anyone I know to go prematurely.. I don't know the people who go past me but someone else does and someday they'll feel the pain we all do now at this grave loss.. I've asked myself so many times since 3rd june why I checked her status on that fateful grey day... I hadn't chatted wit her since 8th may but in my mind I believed I had.. You see someone else on my phone had a similar name and had pinged me on Saturday so I was certain it was Ayoola.. She said she wanted to travel to paris too and I said she should make sure she does someday. Later, I realised I was chatting with Deola not Ayoola. I don't know why I mixed it up.. I told myself I would check up on Ayoola later. I eventually did, but when I did it was too late and I never got a response. Ayoola was gone..
We weren't the closest of friends.. But in the short time I knew her, I loved her like I would any other friend. Ayoola was thoughtful, kind, considerate and cheerful. What I remember most about her is her smile and her simplicity. We also shared an appreciation of growing natural hair and she inspired me to grow mine! She always cared that I got bored in Lagos and didn't have as many friends, which shows to me her value on relationships.. My last conversation with her, she thanked me for spamming a bb message that made her laugh. I apologized in advance for missing her wedding and she mentioned my sisters would be there so it was all cool. She made plans and she most likely lived everyday not thinking the inevitable unknown end would happen when she was still 30. But it did and those plans are up in smoke. C'est la vie, as they say in french.. I feel so sad and yet I'm not her family. How deep must their pain run through? How many tears will their eyes produce? Sleepless nights? I can only pray for them as not enough words can be said to heal their pain. God will turn their ashes to an oil of gladness and healing will be theirs eventually for he is the comforter of those who mourn. Let the inevitability and unknowing nature of death stir in us a desire to set our priorities straight and to make amends where necessary. Goodbye Ayoola. You were loved. ------------------
