OFF TO THE LAND OF SAFARI's

I find myself on boats or ships a lot these days and it can be fun and rough too! I've been trying to upload a picture here but i can't seem to figure out what is wrong with blogger image uploader, so i give up!
Anyway tomorrow, i'm going to be on a jet plane and guess where i'm off to?? Kenya, land of the safaris!!! Kenya has always been on my bucket list of places to visit, so i must say that i am totally excited to be finally going there! Yippee!!! It happens to be a friend's wedding on the 25th, so i will be attending this in a place called Kisumu! Unfortunately its a short trip of just 5days so not very sure i will be able to go on any safari :(... But hey at least i'm glad i ain't going alone! Two of my good friends are tagging along and we've vowed to party the Kenyan Way!!
I'm off for now guys, next time i blog it'll be from Kenya and watch out for my Swahili lyrics!

"Wakati ni kwa chama"!!! (It's time to party!!)
P.S: thank goodness for "google translator" page :D


Coco-C!

Dear God

Dear God,
I only write you letters when upset so here it is! Not again! I really wish you'd give me a heads up when you decide to let stumbling blocks come my way (I guess if you did it would ruin the surprise of what you call a 'trial' and what we humans call 'disappointment'). I wanna say' I get it' but.....

Can we try working on this Father daughter relationship where you tell me when I can and cannot get what I want when I ask?

Yours sincerely,
.....(Guess you remember my name)

Sick at Sea

I have had a fairly difficult week that all i can say is TGIF! From bank frustrations to domestic power issues, unplanned bills, lasting flu, bloodsucking teeth clenching mosquitoes and lastly terrible seasickness, its been a handful of a week to handle.

So I'm required by my job to make occasional visits to ships on and offshore; and while this is normally fun to get out of the office, it can be tasking considering the 45mins to 1hr long trip is made in a canoe with a makeshift engine (don't try this at home kids). Anyway today i went to one of my company's vessels on a location known as Lagos anchorage and i assumed it would be business as usual, little did i know what was coming. I got to the vessel and found myself swinging in every direction like a piece of paper being tossed by the wind, as a result of the sea's high current. I could barely stand and literally had to be hand supported. Next thing i knew, i found my face staring down into a long black chemical smelling polythene in the form of a bin bag puking my intestines out! I knew i was in for a long run as we were scheduled to spend at least 4/5 hours on-board the vessel. To cut a long story short, i called the office and asked to be evacuated immediately or else i would die! Lol.. I can laugh now but i wasn't laughing when i found myself puking 5 times on-board a ship were i was supposed to be working. Of course i had to apologize to the ships crew which i came to see as they ended up fussing over me the whole time. I did manage to put in about an hour and a half's worth of work..

I think I've lost a pound in one day as my stomach feels as flat as a slate! Whew! I won't be going back in a hurry, no thank you!

See pictures below for proof of my sea adventures! (erm, don't laugh :D)

sorry i can't get this picture to rotate! make una manage am like that

Letter to ALL my blog Readers -(I AM OFFENDED)

Dear Spititout Blog Readers,
I am offended and guess who offended me? You! Yes thats right, i refer to YOU (reading my blog right now who's never said a word!)  Offence? YOUR SILENCE!! It sickens me.. I am weary of it! Go on and LOL all you want, call me desperate, call me attention seeking, call me crazy, I am still offended. How can you come here everyday and read my blog and not even say a word? Its not fair now, c'mon.. I check my stats, i have a minimum of 10 hits per day; on good days 70+ hits and not even 1 comment??! Haba its not good now. Oh let me not even attack all you've who've sent me blackberry messenger or Facebook messages  to commend my writing and to mention the fact that they are "avid followers"..they forgot one word in the middle of that, 'silent'! What haven't i done? I gave you the option to "share my page"; "subscribe to comments"; "subscribe to posts"; "become a follower"! Wetin una want again?? Is it because my blog is not a gossip blog like some out there? I know gossip sells but some of us have got to be different. Abi una no like my write-ups? Tell me o make i know whether i go shut down this blog once and for all. And to think i'm not even making money from this blog (and i be igbo gal o), proof that not all igbos are the same.

Now in fairness to you, I know I didn't start this blog with the intention of amassing followers or fishing for comments, but how many intentions remain the same? No be to start the journey, na to finish am so yes right now i don't write for myself alone anymore, i write for you too (abi na lie?). After all some of you have been inspired by messages here, some have made differences in their lives from words seen here, some are even planning to use my articles in their church magazine (you know yourself) and some will infringe on my unspoken copyright policies.
 All I'm saying is, make una try to dey pay for the information and knowledge collection i am freely disseminating here, shuuuuuuuuuuu!

I am offended o, i don talk my own.. If you like judge me, na your own ten kobo be that!
Msstttttttcchhhhhheeeeeeuuuuuuwwwwwwwww!

Yours Offended,                  
Coco-Chinny.

P.S: IF NOTHING CHANGES 3 POSTS AFTER THIS LETTER, E DON BE! YOU KNOW SAY NOTHING FOR UNA AGAIN!

BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING? MY THOUGHTS ON THIS..

bigbrotherafrica.dstv.com

My thoughts on Big Brother Africa (aka BBA)? Hmm… a plethora of words or comments fill my mind yet the one comment that repeats itself is ‘an open justification for immorality’ on global television. Now don’t get me wrong, I enjoy the show, sometimes, but I don’t approve of or subscribe to the low morals exhibited by the housemates on the show nor do I like some of the tasks given to the housemates by ‘big brother’ which clearly encourage nudity and indecent exposure from the housemates.

I just saw a video clip of 2 housemates on the current Big Brother Africa house having sex under the duvet in the bedroom!! That has got to be so wrong. It’s not a movie, it’s a reality show and it’s not a reality show in the western world, it’s a reality show in Africa, hello??!! There’s a saying that we Africans want to be more western than the westerners, I completely agree. While I don’t know if people actually have sex in BB UK or anywhere else, I can say Africa has sure taken the game to a whole new level. Of course this is not the first example of promiscuity ever displayed on BB, take your minds a few years back to when Richard from Tanzania won BBA 3; Tatiana from Angola sure had fun with him regardless of the fact that he was married while on the show. I wonder how his wife felt watching her husband betray the sanctity of their marital union. That’s their cup of tea though…

So back to my thoughts on BBA, it seems very shallow to have to come into a house (of which you cannot leave) for 90 days to live with and compete with strangers from different countries with different behaviors, culture, lifestyle and morals all for $100k USD. The prize money is nice (if you win) but the hassle of being trapped in one location for any number of days and being forced to clash with all types of characters must be frustrating and be reserved for only the most eccentric type of people. Now let me let one cat out of the bag and don’t laugh when you hear this, I actually applied for BBA this year!!! Crazy right?! I know! In retrospect I’m like, ‘what da hell was I thinking’?? I wouldn’t have lasted a week in that house! Heck I’d go into the diary room screaming blue murder and demanding for BB to evict me as fast as possible. And just in case you’re wondering why I applied, I did it for the fun of it! Wanted to see if I was daring enough to be considered ‘worthy’ by the judges of BBA DSTV to grace their most indecent and moral depriving success of a show. FYI I only had the guts to apply when I knew they wouldn’t be showing shower hour on TV anymore!! Which brings me to the questionable ethics of the show; what kind of show in the world would comfortably show me one of the most private things a person does behind closed doors?? Eeeww!!! Why da hell would I want to watch people take a shower? It’s ludicrous! And why da hell would anyone wanna show the world how they take a shower? Please let’s not even talk about the few ladies who opted to shower with bikinis on for a whole 3 months! That’s just crude and nasty.

The big brother eye? Hmmm… Now I don’t wanna get spooky but that eye reminds me of the “Masonic Eye Symbol” used by the “New world order” led by the “Illuminati”.. You’ve heard of them right? Ok in case you haven’t, I’ll fill you in a bit, they say that “it is an occult headed by a small group of shadowy elite, super-rich and powerful individuals with big plans to take global governance of the planet (or as much of the planet as possible) by immoral means. Connections, control and corruption at the highest levels, politicians, sovereignty, economists, bank leaders, business leaders, media moguls, military leaders, top scientific minds (including control of what information is funded for study, what information can be released into the public domain and what is to remain hidden)” peopleforfreedom.com. To be honest I really don’t know what their shenanigans, if any, is all about and I can’t be assed to know so I won’t even attempt to talk about them. All I do is try to stay away from what I don’t give a damn to understand. So whether illuminati or illuminate na occult or not, don’t know and don’t care as long as no one I know is in it and it doesn’t affect me directly. A lot of corporate organizations use the same symbol in different patterns as their logo/external image; which makes me wonder…..

Anyway if y’all wanna keep watching BBA, that’s your 2 dollars but just don’t waste your money voting to keep any house-mate in the house, as DSTV is clearly ripping us off moral decorum and making millions from doing so!! That’s my 2 cents folks!

Peace out! ~~